Chapter
15
There
was a letter from Hilda on the breakfast-tray. `Father
is going to London this week, and I shall call for you
on Thursday week, June 17th. You must be ready so that
we can go at once. I don't want to waste time at Wragby,
it's an awful place. I shall probably stay the night at
Retford with the Colemans, so I should be with you for
lunch, Thursday. Then we could start at teatime, and
sleep perhaps in Grantham. It is no use our spending an
evening with Clifford. If he hates your going, it would
be no pleasure to him.'
So!
She was being pushed round on the chess-board again.
Clifford
hated her going, but it was only because he didn't feel safe
in her absence. Her presence, for some reason, made him
feel safe, and free to do the things he was occupied
with. He was a great deal at the pits, and wrestling in
spirit with the almost hopeless problems of getting out
his coal in the most economical fashion and then selling
it when he'd got it out. He knew he ought to find some
way of using it, or converting it, so that he
needn't sell it, or needn't have the chagrin of failing
to sell it. But if he made electric power, could he sell
that or use it? And to convert into oil was as yet too
costly and too elaborate. To keep industry alive there
must be more industry, like a madness.
It
was a madness, and it required a madman to succeed in
it. Well, he was a little mad. Connie thought so. His
very intensity and acumen in the affairs of the pits
seemed like a manifestation of madness to her, his very
inspirations were the inspirations of insanity.
He
talked to her of all his serious schemes, and she
listened in a kind of wonder, and let him talk. Then the
flow ceased, and he turned on the loudspeaker, and
became a blank, while apparently his schemes coiled on
inside him like a kind of dream.
And
every night now he played pontoon, that game of the
Tommies, with Mrs Bolton, gambling with sixpences. And
again, in the gambling he was gone in a kind of
unconsciousness, or blank intoxication, or intoxication
of blankness, whatever it was. Connie could not bear to
see him. But when she had gone to bed, he and Mrs Bolton
would gamble on till two and three in the morning,
safely, and with strange lust. Mrs Bolton was caught in
the lust as much as Clifford: the more so, as she nearly
always lost.
She
told Connie one day: `I lost twenty-three shillings to
Sir Clifford last night.'
`And
did he take the money from you?' asked Connie aghast.
`Why
of course, my Lady! Debt of honour!'
Connie
expostulated roundly, and was angry with both of them.
The upshot was, Sir Clifford raised Mrs Bolton's wages a
hundred a year, and she could gamble on that. Meanwhile,
it seemed to Connie, Clifford was really going deader.
She
told him at length she was leaving on the seventeenth.
`Seventeenth!'
he said. `And when will you be back?'
`By
the twentieth of July at the latest.'
`Yes!
the twentieth of July.'
Strangely
and blankly he looked at her, with the vagueness of a
child, but with the queer blank cunning of an old man.
`You
won't let me down, now, will you?' he said.
`How?'
`While
you're away, I mean, you're sure to come back?'
`I'm
as sure as I can be of anything, that I shall come
back.'
`Yes!
Well! Twentieth of July!'
He
looked at her so strangely.
Yet
he really wanted her to go. That was so curious. He
wanted her to go, positively, to have her little
adventures and perhaps come home pregnant, and all that.
At the same time, he was afraid of her going.
She
was quivering, watching her real opportunity for leaving
him altogether, waiting till the time, herself himself
should be ripe.
She
sat and talked to the keeper of her going abroad.
`And
then when I come back,' she said, `I can tell Clifford I
must leave him. And you and I can go away. They never
need even know it is you. We can go to another country,
shall we? To Africa or Australia. Shall we?'
She
was quite thrilled by her plan.
`You've
never been to the Colonies, have you?' he asked her.
`No!
Have you?'
`I've
been in India, and South Africa, and Egypt.'
`Why
shouldn't we go to South Africa?'
`We
might!' he said slowly.
`Or
don't you want to?' she asked.
`I
don't care. I don't much care what I do.'
`Doesn't
it make you happy? Why not? We shan't be poor. I have
about six hundred a year, I wrote and asked. It's not
much, but it's enough, isn't it?'
`It's
riches to me.'
`Oh,
how lovely it will be!'
`But
I ought to get divorced, and so ought you, unless we're
going to have complications.'
There
was plenty to think about.
Another
day she asked him about himself. They were in the hut,
and there was a thunderstorm.
`And
weren't you happy, when you were a lieutenant and an
officer and a gentleman?'
`Happy?
All right. I liked my Colonel.'
`Did
you love him?'
`Yes!
I loved him.'
`And
did he love you?'
`Yes!
In a way, he loved me.'
`Tell
me about him.'
`What
is there to tell? He had risen from the ranks. He loved
the army. And he had never married. He was twenty years
older than me. He was a very intelligent man: and alone
in the army, as such a man is: a passionate man in his
way: and a very clever officer. I lived under his spell
while I was with him. I sort of let him run my life. And
I never regret it.'
`And
did you mind very much when he died?'
`I
was as near death myself. But when I came to, I knew
another part of me was finished. But then I had always
known it would finish in death. All things do, as far as
that goes.'
She
sat and ruminated. The thunder crashed outside. It was
like being in a little ark in the Flood.
`You
seem to have such a lot behind you,' she said.
`Do
I? It seems to me I've died once or twice already. Yet
here I am, pegging on, and in for more trouble.'
She
was thinking hard, yet listening to the storm.
`And
weren't you happy as an officer and a gentleman, when
your Colonel was dead?'
`No!
They were a mingy lot.' He laughed suddenly. `The
Colonel used to say: Lad, the English middle classes
have to chew every mouthful thirty times because their
guts are so narrow, a bit as big as a pea would give
them a stoppage. They're the mingiest set of ladylike
snipe ever invented: full of conceit of themselves,
frightened even if their boot-laces aren't correct,
rotten as high game, and always in the right. That's
what finishes me up. Kow-tow, kow-tow, arse-licking till
their tongues are tough: yet they're always in the
right. Prigs on top of everything. Prigs! A generation
of ladylike prigs with half a ball each---'
Connie
laughed. The rain was rushing down.
`He
hated them!'
`No,'
said he. `He didn't bother. He just disliked them.
There's a difference. Because, as he said, the Tommies
are getting just as priggish and half-balled and
narrow-gutted. It's the fate of mankind, to go that
way.'
`The
common people too, the working people?'
`All
the lot. Their spunk is gone dead. Motor-cars and
cinemas and aeroplanes suck that last bit out of them. I
tell you, every generation breeds a more rabbity
generation, with india rubber tubing for guts and tin
legs and tin faces. Tin people! It's all a steady sort
of bolshevism just killing off the human thing, and
worshipping the mechanical thing. Money, money, money!
All the modern lot get their real kick out of killing
the old human feeling out of man, making mincemeat of
the old Adam and the old Eve. They're all alike. The
world is all alike: kill off the human reality, a quid
for every foreskin, two quid for each pair of balls.
What is cunt but machine-fucking!---It's all alike. Pay
'em money to cut off the world's cock. Pay money, money,
money to them that will take spunk out of mankind, and
leave 'em all little twiddling machines.'
He
sat there in the hut, his face pulled to mocking irony.
Yet even then, he had one ear set backwards, listening
to the storm over the wood. It made him feel so alone.
`But
won't it ever come to an end?' she said.
`Ay,
it will. It'll achieve its own salvation. When the last
real man is killed, and they're all tame: white,
black, yellow, all colours of tame ones: then they'll all
be insane. Because the root of sanity is in the balls.
Then they'll all be insane, and they'll make
their grand ~auto da fe. You know auto da fe
means act of faith? Ay, well, they'll make their own
grand little act of faith. They'll offer one another
up.'
`You
mean kill one another?'
`I
do, duckie! If we go on at our present rate then in a
hundred years' time there won't be ten thousand people
in this island: there may not be ten. They'll have
lovingly wiped each other out. The thunder was rolling
further away.
`How
nice!' she said.
`Quite
nice! To contemplate the extermination of the human
species and the long pause that follows before some
other species crops up, it calms you more than anything
else. And if we go on in this way, with everybody,
intellectuals, artists, government, industrialists and
workers all frantically killing off the last human
feeling, the last bit of their intuition, the last
healthy instinct; if it goes on in algebraical
progression, as it is going on: then ta-tah! to the
human species! Goodbye! darling! the serpent swallows
itself and leaves a void, considerably messed up, but
not hopeless. Very nice! When savage wild dogs bark in
Wragby, and savage wild pit-ponies stamp on Tevershall
pit-bank! te deum laudamus!'
Connie
laughed, but not very happily.
`Then
you ought to be pleased that they are all bolshevists,'
she said. `You ought to be pleased that they hurry on
towards the end.'
`So
I am. I don't stop 'em. Because I couldn't if I would.'
`Then
why are you so bitter?'
`I'm
not! If my cock gives its last crow, I don't mind.'
`But
if you have a child?' she said.
He
dropped his head.
`Why,'
he said at last. `It seems to me a wrong and bitter
thing to do, to bring a child into this world.'
`No!
Don't say it! Don't say it!' she pleaded. `I think I'm
going to have one. Say you'll he pleased.' She laid her
hand on his.
`I'm
pleased for you to be pleased,' he said. `But for me it
seems a ghastly treachery to the unborn creature.
`Ah
no!' she said, shocked. `Then you can't ever
really want me! You can't want me, if you feel
that!'
Again
he was silent, his face sullen. Outside there was only
the threshing of the rain.
`It's
not quite true!' she whispered. `It's not quite true!
There's another truth.' She felt he was bitter now
partly because she was leaving him, deliberately going
away to Venice. And this half pleased her.
She
pulled open his clothing and uncovered his belly, and
kissed his navel. Then she laid her cheek on his belly
and pressed her arm round his warm, silent loins. They
were alone in the flood.
`Tell
me you want a child, in hope!' she murmured, pressing
her face against his belly. `Tell me you do!'
`Why!'
he said at last: and she felt the curious quiver of
changing consciousness and relaxation going through his
body. `Why I've thought sometimes if one but tried, here
among th' colliers even! They're workin' bad now, an'
not earnin' much. If a man could say to 'em: Dunna think
o' nowt but th' money. When it comes ter wants,
we want but little. Let's not live for money---'
She
softly rubbed her cheek on his belly, and gathered his
balls in her hand. The penis stirred softly, with
strange life, but did not rise up. The rain beat
bruisingly outside.
`Let's
live for summat else. Let's not live ter make money,
neither for us-selves nor for anybody else. Now we're
forced to. We're forced to make a bit for us-selves, an'
a fair lot for th' bosses. Let's stop it! Bit by bit,
let's stop it. We needn't rant an' rave. Bit by bit,
let's drop the whole industrial life an' go back. The
least little bit o' money'll do. For everybody, me an'
you, bosses an' masters, even th' king. The least little
bit o' money'll really do. Just make up your mind to it,
an' you've got out o' th' mess.' He paused, then went
on:
`An'
I'd tell 'em: Look! Look at Joe! He moves lovely! Look
how he moves, alive and aware. He's beautiful! An' look
at Jonah! He's clumsy, he's ugly, because he's niver
willin' to rouse himself I'd tell 'em: Look! look at
yourselves! one shoulder higher than t'other, legs
twisted, feet all lumps! What have yer done ter
yerselves, wi' the blasted work? Spoilt yerselves. No
need to work that much. Take yer clothes off an' look at
yourselves. Yer ought ter be alive an' beautiful, an'
yer ugly an' half dead. So I'd tell 'em. An' I'd get my
men to wear different clothes: appen close red trousers,
bright red, an' little short white jackets. Why, if men
had red, fine legs, that alone would change them in a
month. They'd begin to be men again, to be men! An' the
women could dress as they liked. Because if once the men
walked with legs close bright scarlet, and buttocks nice
and showing scarlet under a little white jacket: then
the women 'ud begin to be women. It's because th' men aren't
men, that th' women have to be.---An' in time pull down
Tevershall and build a few beautiful buildings, that
would hold us all. An' clean the country up again. An'
not have many children, because the world is
overcrowded.
`But
I wouldn't preach to the men: only strip 'em an' say:
Look at yourselves! That's workin' for money!---Hark at
yourselves! That's working for money. You've been
working for money! Look at Tevershall! It's horrible.
That's because it was built while you was working for
money. Look at your girls! They don't care about you,
you don't care about them. It's because you've spent
your time working an' caring for money. You can't talk
nor move nor live, you can't properly be with a woman.
You're not alive. Look at yourselves!'
There
fell a complete silence. Connie was half listening, and
threading in the hair at the root of his belly a few
forget-me-nots that she had gathered on the way to the
hut. Outside, the world had gone still, and a little
icy.
`You've
got four kinds of hair,' she said to him. `On your chest
it's nearly black, and your hair isn't dark on your
head: but your moustache is hard and dark red, and your
hair here, your love-hair, is like a little brush of
bright red-gold mistletoe. It's the loveliest of all!'
He
looked down and saw the milky bits of forget-me-nots in
the hair on his groin.
`Ay!
That's where to put forget-me-nots, in the man-hair, or
the maiden-hair. But don't you care about the future?'
She
looked up at him.
`Oh,
I do, terribly!' she said.
`Because
when I feel the human world is doomed, has doomed itself
by its own mingy beastliness, then I feel the Colonies
aren't far enough. The moon wouldn't be far enough,
because even there you could look back and see the
earth, dirty, beastly, unsavoury among all the stars:
made foul by men. Then I feel I've swallowed gall, and
it's eating my inside out, and nowhere's far enough away
to get away. But when I get a turn, I forget it all
again. Though it's a shame, what's been done to people
these last hundred years: men turned into nothing but
labour-insects, and all their manhood taken away, and
all their real life. I'd wipe the machines off the face
of the earth again, and end the industrial epoch
absolutely, like a black mistake. But since I can't, an'
nobody can, I'd better hold my peace, an' try an' live
my own life: if I've got one to live, which I rather
doubt.'
The
thunder had ceased outside, but the rain which had
abated, suddenly came striking down, with a last blench
of lightning and mutter of departing storm. Connie was
uneasy. He had talked so long now, and he was really
talking to himself not to her. Despair seemed to come
down on him completely, and she was feeling happy, she
hated despair. She knew her leaving him, which he had
only just realized inside himself had plunged him back
into this mood. And she triumphed a little.
She
opened the door and looked at the straight heavy rain,
like a steel curtain, and had a sudden desire to rush
out into it, to rush away. She got up, and began swiftly
pulling off her stockings, then her dress and
underclothing, and he held his breath. Her pointed keen
animal breasts tipped and stirred as she moved. She was
ivory-coloured in the greenish light. She slipped on her
rubber shoes again and ran out with a wild little laugh,
holding up her breasts to the heavy rain and spreading
her arms, and running blurred in the rain with the
eurhythmic dance movements she had learned so long ago
in Dresden. It was a strange pallid figure lifting and
falling, bending so the rain beat and glistened on the
full haunches, swaying up again and coming belly-forward
through the rain, then stooping again so that only the
full loins and buttocks were offered in a kind of homage
towards him, repeating a wild obeisance.
He
laughed wryly, and threw off his clothes. It was too
much. He jumped out, naked and white, with a little
shiver, into the hard slanting rain. Flossie sprang
before him with a frantic little bark. Connie, her hair
all wet and sticking to her head, turned her hot face
and saw him. Her blue eyes blazed with excitement as she
turned and ran fast, with a strange charging movement,
out of the clearing and down the path, the wet boughs
whipping her. She ran, and he saw nothing but the round
wet head, the wet back leaning forward in flight, the
rounded buttocks twinkling: a wonderful cowering female
nakedness in flight.
She
was nearly at the wide riding when he came up and flung
his naked arm round her soft, naked-wet middle. She gave
a shriek and straightened herself and the heap of her
soft, chill flesh came up against his body. He pressed
it all up against him, madly, the heap of soft, chilled
female flesh that became quickly warm as flame, in
contact. The rain streamed on them till they smoked. He
gathered her lovely, heavy posteriors one in each hand
and pressed them in towards him in a frenzy, quivering
motionless in the rain. Then suddenly he tipped her up
and fell with her on the path, in the roaring silence of
the rain, and short and sharp, he took her, short and
sharp and finished, like an animal.
He
got up in an instant, wiping the rain from his eyes.
`Come
in,' he said, and they started running back to the hut.
He ran straight and swift: he didn't like the rain. But
she came slower, gathering forget-me-nots and campion
and bluebells, running a few steps and watching him
fleeing away from her.
When
she came with her flowers, panting to the hut, he had
already started a fire, and the twigs were crackling.
Her sharp breasts rose and fell, her hair was plastered
down with rain, her face was flushed ruddy and her body
glistened and trickled. Wide-eyed and breathless, with a
small wet head and full, trickling, naïve haunches,
she looked another creature.
He
took the old sheet and rubbed her down, she standing
like a child. Then he rubbed himself having shut the
door of the hut. The fire was blazing up. She ducked her
head in the other end of the sheet, and rubbed her wet
hair.
`We're
drying ourselves together on the same towel, we shall
quarrel!' he said.
She
looked up for a moment, her hair all odds and ends.
`No!'
she said, her eyes wide. `It's not a towel, it's a
sheet.' And she went on busily rubbing her head, while
he busily rubbed his.
Still
panting with their exertions, each wrapped in an army
blanket, but the front of the body open to the fire,
they sat on a log side by side before the blaze, to get
quiet. Connie hated the feel of the blanket against her
skin. But now the sheet was all wet.
She
dropped her blanket and kneeled on the clay hearth,
holding her head to the fire, and shaking her hair to
dry it. He watched the beautiful curving drop of her
haunches. That fascinated him today. How it sloped with
a rich down-slope to the heavy roundness of her
buttocks! And in between, folded in the secret warmth,
the secret entrances!
He
stroked her tail with his hand, long and subtly taking
in the curves and the globe-fullness.
`Tha's
got such a nice tail on thee,' he said, in the throaty
caressive dialect. `Tha's got the nicest arse of
anybody. It's the nicest, nicest woman's arse as is! An'
ivery bit of it is woman, woman sure as nuts. Tha'rt not
one o' them button-arsed lasses as should be lads, are
ter! Tha's got a real soft sloping bottom on thee, as a
man loves in 'is guts. It's a bottom as could hold the
world up, it is!'
All
the while he spoke he exquisitely stroked the rounded
tail, till it seemed as if a slippery sort of fire came
from it into his hands. And his finger-tips touched the
two secret openings to her body, time after time, with a
soft little brush of fire.
`An'
if tha shits an' if tha pisses, I'm glad. I don't want a
woman as couldna shit nor piss.'
Connie
could not help a sudden snort of astonished laughter,
but he went on unmoved.
`Tha'rt
real, tha art! Tha'art real, even a bit of a bitch. Here
tha shits an' here tha pisses: an' I lay my hand on 'em
both an' like thee for it. I like thee for it. Tha's got
a proper, woman's arse, proud of itself. It's none
ashamed of itself this isna.'
He
laid his hand close and firm over her secret places, in
a kind of close greeting.
`I
like it,' he said. `I like it! An' if I only lived ten
minutes, an' stroked thy arse an' got to know it, I
should reckon I'd lived one life, see ter!
Industrial system or not! Here's one o' my lifetimes.'
She
turned round and climbed into his lap, clinging to him.
`Kiss me!' she whispered.
And
she knew the thought of their separation was latent in
both their minds, and at last she was sad.
She
sat on his thighs, her head against his breast, and her
ivory-gleaming legs loosely apart, the fire glowing
unequally upon them. Sitting with his head dropped, he
looked at the folds of her body in the fire-glow, and at
the fleece of soft brown hair that hung down to a point
between her open thighs. He reached to the table behind,
and took up her bunch of flowers, still so wet that
drops of rain fell on to her.
`Flowers
stops out of doors all weathers,' he said. `They have no
houses.'
`Not
even a hut!' she murmured.
With
quiet fingers he threaded a few forget-me-not flowers in
the fine brown fleece of the mound of Venus.
`There!'
he said. `There's forget-me-nots in the right place!'
She
looked down at the milky odd little flowers among the
brown maiden-hair at the lower tip of her body.
`Doesn't
it look pretty!' she said.
`Pretty
as life,' he replied.
And
he stuck a pink campion-bud among the hair.
`There!
That's me where you won't forget me! That's Moses in the
bull-rushes.'
`You
don't mind, do you, that I'm going away?' she asked
wistfully, looking up into his face.
But
his face was inscrutable, under the heavy brows. He kept
it quite blank.
`You
do as you wish,' he said.
And
he spoke in good English.
`But
I won't go if you don't wish it,' she said, clinging to
him.
There
was silence. He leaned and put another piece of wood on
the fire. The flame glowed on his silent, abstracted
face. She waited, but he said nothing.
`Only
I thought it would be a good way to begin a break with
Clifford. I do want a child. And it would give me a
chance to, to---,' she resumed.
`To
let them think a few lies,' he said.
`Yes,
that among other things. Do you want them to think the
truth?'
`I
don't care what they think.'
`I
do! I don't want them handling me with their unpleasant
cold minds, not while I'm still at Wragby. They can
think what they like when I'm finally gone.'
He
was silent.
`But
Sir Clifford expects you to come back to him?'
`Oh,
I must come back,' she said: and there was silence.
`And
would you have a child in Wragby?' he asked.
She
closed her arm round his neck.
`If
you wouldn't take me away, I should have to,' she said.
`Take
you where to?'
`Anywhere!
away! But right away from Wragby.'
`When?'
`Why,
when I come back.'
`But
what's the good of coming back, doing the thing twice,
if you're once gone?' he said.
`Oh,
I must come back. I've promised! I've promised so
faithfully. Besides, I come back to you, really.'
`To
your husband's game-keeper?'
`I
don't see that that matters,' she said.
`No?'
He mused a while. `And when would you think of going
away again, then; finally? When exactly?'
`Oh,
I don't know. I'd come back from Venice. And then we'd
prepare everything.'
`How
prepare?'
`Oh,
I'd tell Clifford. I'd have to tell him.'
`Would
you!'
He
remained silent. She put her arms round his neck.
`Don't
make it difficult for me,' she pleaded.
`Make
what difficult?'
`For
me to go to Venice and arrange things.'
A
little smile, half a grin, flickered on his face.
`I
don't make it difficult,' he said. `I only want to find
out just what you are after. But you don't really know
yourself. You want to take time: get away and look at
it. I don't blame you. I think you're wise. You may
prefer to stay mistress of Wragby. I don't blame you.
I've no Wragbys to offer. In fact, you know what you'll
get out of me. No, no, I think you're right! I really
do! And I'm not keen on coming to live on you, being
kept by you. There's that too.'
She
felt somehow as if he were giving her tit for tat.
`But
you want me, don't you?' she asked.
`Do
you want me?'
`You
know I do. That's evident.'
`Quite!
And when do you want me?'
`You
know we can arrange it all when I come back. Now I'm out
of breath with you. I must get calm and clear.'
`Quite!
Get calm and clear!'
She
was a little offended.
`But
you trust me, don't you?' she said.
`Oh,
absolutely!'
She
heard the mockery in his tone.
`Tell
me then,' she said flatly; `do you think it would be
better if I don't go to Venice?'
`I'm
sure it's better if you do go to Venice,' he replied in
the cool, slightly mocking voice.
`You
know it's next Thursday?' she said.
`Yes!'
She
now began to muse. At last she said:
`And
we shall know better where we are when I come
back, shan't we?'
`Oh
surely!'
The
curious gulf of silence between them!
`I've
been to the lawyer about my divorce,' he said, a little
constrainedly.
She
gave a slight shudder.
`Have
you!' she said. `And what did he say?'
`He
said I ought to have done it before; that may be a
difficulty. But since I was in the army, he thinks it
will go through all right. If only it doesn't bring her
down on my head!'
`Will
she have to know?'
`Yes!
she is served with a notice: so is the man she lives
with, the co-respondent.'
`Isn't
it hateful, all the performances! I suppose I'd have to
go through it with Clifford.'
There
was a silence.
`And
of course,' he said, `I have to live an exemplary life
for the next six or eight months. So if you go to
Venice, there's temptation removed for a week or two, at
least.'
`Am
I temptation!' she said, stroking his face. `I'm so glad
I'm temptation to you! Don't let's think about it! You
frighten me when you start thinking: you roll me out
flat. Don't let's think about it. We can think so much
when we are apart. That's the whole point! I've been
thinking, I must come to you for another night before I
go. I must come once more to the cottage. Shall I
come on Thursday night?'
`Isn't
that when your sister will be there?'
`Yes!
But she said we would start at tea-time. So we could
start at tea-time. But she could sleep somewhere else
and I could sleep with you.
`But
then she'd have to know.'
`Oh,
I shall tell her. I've more or less told her already. I
must talk it all over with Hilda. She's a great help, so
sensible.'
He
was thinking of her plan.
`So
you'd start off from Wragby at tea-time, as if you were
going to London? Which way were you going?'
`By
Nottingham and Grantham.'
`And
then your sister would drop you somewhere and you'd walk
or drive back here? Sounds very risky, to me.'
`Does
it? Well, then, Hilda could bring me back. She could
sleep at Mansfield, and bring me back here in the
evening, and fetch me again in the morning. It's quite
easy.'
`And
the people who see you?'
`I'll
wear goggles and a veil.'
He
pondered for some time.
`Well,'
he said. `You please yourself as usual.'
`But
wouldn't it please you?'
`Oh
yes! It'd please me all right,' he said a little grimly.
`I might as well smite while the iron's hot.'
`Do
you know what I thought?' she said suddenly. `It
suddenly came to me. You are the "Knight of the
Burning Pestle"!'
`Ay!
And you? Are you the Lady of the Red-Hot Mortar?'
`Yes!'
she said. `Yes! You're Sir Pestle and I'm Lady Mortar.'
`All
right, then I'm knighted. John Thomas is Sir John, to
your Lady Jane.'
`Yes!
John Thomas is knighted! I'm my-lady-maiden-hair, and
you must have flowers too. Yes!'
She
threaded two pink campions in the bush of red-gold hair
above his penis.
`There!'
she said. `Charming! Charming! Sir John!'
And
she pushed a bit of forget-me-not in the dark hair of
his breast.
`And
you won't forget me there, will you?' She kissed him on
the breast, and made two bits of forget-me-not lodge one
over each nipple, kissing him again.
`Make
a calendar of me!' he said. He laughed, and the flowers
shook from his breast.
`Wait
a bit!' he said.
He
rose, and opened the door of the hut. Flossie, lying in
the porch, got up and looked at him.
`Ay,
it's me!' he said.
The
rain had ceased. There was a wet, heavy, perfumed
stillness. Evening was approaching.
He
went out and down the little path in the opposite
direction from the riding. Connie watched his thin,
white figure, and it looked to her like a ghost, an
apparition moving away from her.
When
she could see it no more, her heart sank. She stood in
the door of the hut, with a blanket round her, looking
into the drenched, motionless silence.
But
he was coming back, trotting strangely, and carrying
flowers. She was a little afraid of him, as if he were
not quite human. And when he came near, his eyes looked
into hers, but she could not understand the meaning.
He
had brought columbines and campions, and new-mown hay,
and oak-tufts and honeysuckle in small bud. He fastened
fluffy young oak-sprays round her breasts, sticking in
tufts of bluebells and campion: and in her navel he
poised a pink campion flower, and in her maiden-hair
were forget-me-nots and woodruff.
`That's
you in all your glory!' he said. `Lady Jane, at her
wedding with John Thomas.'
And
he stuck flowers in the hair of his own body, and wound
a bit of creeping-jenny round his penis, and stuck a
single bell of a hyacinth in his navel. She watched him
with amusement, his odd intentness. And she pushed a
campion flower in his moustache, where it stuck,
dangling under his nose.
`This
is John Thomas marryin' Lady Jane,' he said. `An' we mun
let Constance an' Oliver go their ways. Maybe---'
He
spread out his hand with a gesture, and then he sneezed,
sneezing away the flowers from his nose and his navel.
He sneezed again.
`Maybe
what?' she said, waiting for him to go on.
He
looked at her a little bewildered.
`Eh?'
he said.
`Maybe
what? Go on with what you were going to say,' she
insisted.
`Ay,
what was I going to say?'
He
had forgotten. And it was one of the disappointments of
her life, that he never finished.
A
yellow ray of sun shone over the trees.
`Sun!'
he said. `And time you went. Time, my Lady, time! What's
that as flies without wings, your Ladyship? Time! Time!'
He
reached for his shirt.
`Say
goodnight! to John Thomas,' he said, looking down at his
penis. `He's safe in the arms of creeping Jenny! Not
much burning pestle about him just now.'
And
he put his flannel shirt over his head.
`A
man's most dangerous moment,' he said, when his head had
emerged, `is when he's getting into his shirt. Then he
puts his head in a bag. That's why I prefer those
American shirts, that you put on like a jacket.' She
still stood watching him. He stepped into his short
drawers, and buttoned them round the waist.
`Look
at Jane!' he said. `In all her blossoms! Who'll put
blossoms on you next year, Jinny? Me, or somebody else?
"Good-bye, my bluebell, farewell to you!" I
hate that song, it's early war days.' He then sat down,
and was pulling on his stockings. She still stood
unmoving. He laid his hand on the slope of her buttocks.
`Pretty little Lady Jane!' he said. `Perhaps in Venice
you'll find a man who'll put jasmine in your
maiden-hair, and a pomegranate flower in your navel.
Poor little lady Jane!'
`Don't
say those things!' she said. `You only say them to hurt
me.'
He
dropped his head. Then he said, in dialect:
`Ay,
maybe I do, maybe I do! Well then, I'll say nowt, an'
ha' done wi't. But tha mun dress thysen, all' go back to
thy stately homes of England, how beautiful they stand.
Time's up! Time's up for Sir John, an' for little Lady
Jane! Put thy shimmy on, Lady Chatterley! Tha might be
anybody, standin' there be-out even a shimmy, an' a few
rags o' flowers. There then, there then, I'll undress
thee, tha bob-tailed young throstle.' And he took the
leaves from her hair, kissing her damp hair, and the
flowers from her breasts, and kissed her breasts, and
kissed her navel, and kissed her maiden-hair, where he
left the flowers threaded. `They mun stop while they
will,' he said. `So! There tha'rt bare again, nowt but a
bare-arsed lass an' a bit of a Lady Jane! Now put thy
shimmy on, for tha mun go, or else Lady Chatterley's
goin' to be late for dinner, an' where 'ave yer been to
my pretty maid!'
She
never knew how to answer him when he was in this
condition of the vernacular. So she dressed herself and
prepared to go a little ignominiously home to Wragby. Or
so she felt it: a little ignominiously home.
He
would accompany her to the broad riding. His young
pheasants were all right under the shelter.
When
he and she came out on to the riding, there was Mrs
Bolton faltering palely towards them.
`Oh,
my Lady, we wondered if anything had happened!'
`No!
Nothing has happened.'
Mrs
Bolton looked into the man's face, that was smooth and
new-looking with love. She met his half-laughing,
half-mocking eyes. He always laughed at mischance. But
he looked at her kindly.
`Evening,
Mrs Bolton! Your Ladyship will be all right now, so I
can leave you. Good-night to your Ladyship! Good-night,
Mrs Bolton!'
He
saluted and turned away. |